so far so good...

i havent been blogging lately...

as much as i would want to...

im just tooooo exhausted to open up a new entry...

id rather curl up and watch tv...

and eat...

damn, ive been eating like crazy almost every weekend...

this alarms me...

anyway, october has been a good vibe month for me...

i started work last oct 5... and strangely enough... the doubt has passed...

though theres a new issue...

im sure that after a couple of days (eep... weeks), everything will be ayt...

im slowly starting to like where im at...

i just hope that it doesnt go awry...

because for once, i like the people... i like the job... i even like my boss...

so im hoping that everything will turn out for the good...

besides having a new job...

october marks the 27th year of my life...

last october 24 me and a couple of friends celebrated my bday...

along with another friend whose bday was a week before...

we had brunch/carboloading at salcedo park...

the food was delicious...

being home made and everything, it was soooo delicious...

the only qualm about that place is that there are no 'good' seats...

literally...

despite warning that i should rest for the race the day after...

i still went ahead with my plan... and hmmm... did something..

totally not me...

lets just * wink * at this one... hehe

but im sure glad that i did...

and ill be doing it more often than not... * lol *

so come the 25th... race day...

this was my first 21k ever...

and im scared shitless...

good thing, i was able to relax the day before...

the call time was at 5am... slept at 12am up by 2am and race ready by 430am...

yeah, i was that excited...

race time... i started exactly at 530am...

there was a feeling of tension and fear...

the thought, what if i couldnt finish this race...

and i was scared to see that that happen...

i set my mind forward to 9am... thinking of what could happen after...

and it worked...

the route was familiar, with a few kilometers of new route...

but all in all i enjoyed it...

my goal was to finish it and not compete with everyone else...

each step i took was tiring...

but it was also fulfilling...

and the adrenalin just pumped me out more...

a good 2hrs and 12mins later... i was done...

i finished it...

the sweat and exhaustion was completely obliterated at the sight of the finish line...

i was proud of myself for finishing 21k...

after the run, i was fast forward thinking to nov 15's run - Timex...

definitely running 21k again...

=) *woot woot*

life couldnt be great right now...

well it could be greater... and id appreciate another push...

so far so good...

october 2009 has been the best so far...

and i wouldnt have it any other way else...

...

* cheers *

first week...

so its been a week since ive started in my new job...

frankly...

ive been having doubts...

stupid to have doubts about it when ive already signed the contract...

i dont know really...

theres a lot of mixed emotions in me...

at one side, im happy to be back in the 'work' force...

excited to learn new things...

excited for all the possibilities...

but then theres the other side...

i feel sad for putting my 'dreams' on the backseat again...

i feel sad for the possibility that never came to realization...

i feel sad for going against what ive been preaching for the past 7 mos...

hmmm...

maybe thats it...

its the real reason why theres so much conflict going on around me...

im disappointed for subjecting myself to something that i dont love...

im disappointed for putting my dreams aside because of the circumstance, bad timing and lack of resource...

im disappointed for allowing OTHER people to take control of my dreams leaving me powerless to steer my future...

dreams dont wait...

they run fleeting from dreamers...

its up to the dreamers to take hold of their destiny...

i BABBLE all about these stuff...

and yet i find myself 'stuck' in a position where i feel i shouldnt be...

i am a sell-out...

a turn-coat to my own principles...

---

so its been a week since ive started in my new job...

its also been more than week since ive been crying...

im crying because im back to being normal...

average...

i know im more than that...

i wont settle to be just average...

im here to do more...

im here to be someone...

---

if it will take me 10 or more jobs to get to that 'goal'...

if sacrifices are needed to reach that dream, then sacrifice i shall...

what i just worry is time...

a life-time is not enough to live life...

theres so much room for mistakes...

theres so much room to learn...

theres so much room for regrets...

theres so much room for everything...

---

i think ive made a big mistake...

and i think i have to correct this ASAP...

life wont wait for me...

i have to catch up...

i seriously have to...

* sigh *

wandering thoughts

wandering thoughts...

- "Oo, mahal kita... as if you didnt know..."

- some people fall in love, i had to crash into it...

- coz im hopeful, yes i am, hopeful for today

- 21 on 25 for 27

- 05Oct09 officially ends my 7mos vacation, back to the workforce, im officially a corporate slut-hoe... * lol *... keeping the positive vibes...

* sigh *

these are the thoughts that fly above my head...

damn...